Bodyguard to the Queen, rescuer of humanity, Harry gives us a much-needed laugh

By Harry’s own admission he’s pretty dense and does his finest work playing first person shooters. That everyman authenticity worked well until he decided – under the influence of wife Meghan Markle – to sound brainy. Now, hectoring us about raindrops and mindfulness, his jargon-led waffle says and means nothing.

Unless he’s doing comedy. That’s right in his wheelhouse. So, back to that.

For anyone wanting an encore of his lines, Harry dished with Hoda about the Windsor afternoon tea he and Meghan had with the Queen “in some element of privacy” (translation: in private, until he talked about it) this week.

The meeting was “great”, being with his grandmother was “great”, she was in “great form” and “always has a great sense of humour with me” (but only with me.) So far, so great! Then the duke tried out his latest material, which positioned him as a hybrid Jason Bourne/Jaime Lannister/Jamie Fraser.

“I’m just making sure that she’s protected and got the right people around her,” he said of his key role. Pow! That organic kombucha must be stronger than we know.

Even 10,000 kms away, Harry is able to simultaneously defend the throne and tear down the Queen by suing her government over security and calling her a bad mum who heads up a racist family.

Maybe I take back that bit about him being run-of-the-mill.

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Harry, 37, made every base a winner during his 12-minute yak with the media he purports to hate and madly sues until he needs it. He explained the concept of children (“little people”) and said his daily mantra (improving the world, der) is “dangerous” because “I need to make sure I don’t have burnout.”

But even with his exquisite timing, Harry may not have read the room when it came to taking ownership of the memory of his mother Princess Diana. He said she’s “done her bit” with Prince William and “now she’s helping me set up.”

The UK media lit up in fury at the idea that the late princess’ beyond-the-grave powers would be limited to one son. That was predictable. I’m more interested in knowing how Meghan feels about not being the only woman of the house.